Current Mood:         Giddy because I can find out every minute detail of
                                    my favorite men (NO THIS DOES NOT INCLUDE
                                    J.C. CHASEZ)

Current Song:          "Maria" by my boyfriend Ricky Martin

Entry 1: Do people really do this shit?

I just got a brand new computer with AOL and got hooked up to the net. My best friend has had AOL for a long time but I resisted this stuff. Even now it’s all creepy to me but I don’t have shit else to do. The only reason I started going on-line in the first place was to find out shit about that boy band ‘N Sync.

You heard of them, the watered-down version of Backstreet? Now there’s a real group. Except for that loser, Howie D. Has the nerve to call himself Sweet D. What a fucking loser. He gives Latinos a bad name unlike Ricky Martin, the hottest fucking male on the planet. Except for Jason Kidd.

But about ‘N Sync. My two best friends used to be obsessed with New Kids on the Block and Jen is in medical school in Philly and it turns out Jordan got himself a gig opening up for the latest version of the New Kids. So my other best friend, that fool Tara, drove up there from Maryland to see him sing whatever, like, two songs he got to sing. He only has one hit. That’s okay, whatever floats their boat. They knew better than to twist their lips to ask me.

They actually should’ve asked me because then Tara wouldn’t have gone and started dating that eighteen-year-old kid in ‘N Sync. Jason? Jimmy? Nah, unfortunately I totally remember his name, I met his ass way too many times. It’s Justin. He’s the one who looks like he’s crying in that video where they’re locked up in an insane asylum. So yeah they’re all hugged up now in each other’s face. I don’t like him, I’ll tell you that right now. No need to lie. He gives me the creeps, acting all sensitive and whiny in videos and than being a complete asshole in person. He ain’t all bad, just mostly bad.

And how come he gets all the glory when that other dude JC is the one who can really sing? He’s carrying the group. He sings all the best songs! Not that I like any of them. It’s all about hip-hop for me, baby. That guy just has talent, that’s all. I don’t like him or anything. Please. And save your hate mail because I stand by my opinion.

On to more important stuff like ME. My name is Sasha, 23 years old and the youngest of all my friends even though I run thangs but the oldest in my family. I have a younger brother who is a pain in the ass.. Jen, Tara and I all grew up together since pre-school and stayed tight ever since. We do everything together or we DID until Jen’s ass moved to Philly. Tara’s still around though so that’s cool. Her parents died about a year ago and she’s all alone, and I keep an eye on her. I’m a bitch but I take care of my friends. All two of them, I don’t need any more.

But listen to this! My parents have been bitching about me moving out since I finished college, talking about how I need to grow up and learn responsibility. Ain’t that some shit? But they’re just about begging her to move into the house. I don’t care, I love her and she can move in anytime she wants, she’s already family. Just tell me why it’s okay for her to live here and sit on her ass but when it comes to me, they leave the want ads next to my breakfast on a daily basis? My parents are bugging, I swear. I don’t have time for this shit. I got good grades in school and college, got my fucking degree in Mathematics, what else do they want me to do? I worked hard my whole life. Now’s the time for me to chill and find my rich husband that can keep me in the style to which I’ve become accustomed.

This Internet shit might be fun though. I started playing around on-line at Tara’s after we went to this basketball game that Justin’s group threw. Some charity shit that isn’t important, I mean I paid some money so whatever charity it was got money. The important part is that Jason Kidd was there and Sasha was oh-so-happy! He’s everything I thought he was and then some. Girlfriend, fiancée, whatever, his ass ain’t on lock down if you know what I mean. And I bet you do. If you don’t, stop reading now because you’re dumb and I don’t want any idiots on my page.

But yeah I like the Internet. I went with Tara to one of ‘N Sync’s concerts a few weeks ago and check it, there were fans snapping pictures of me and her just because we went to eat with the group. Can you believe that? And then at the game, fools were like the fucking paparazzi and shit. When I was in the lobby looking for Jason Kidd some of them actually assumed I was there to see ‘N Sync too -- something that offends me to the core -- and told me how they all talk on-line and that’s how they get their info. Then Tara started wishing she had a picture of her and Crying Boy, so I went on-line and discovered there’s a whole bunch of crazy people who sit up and talk about them all day and night. Since I have nothing else to do, I made a fake screen name called NSyncinMD (makes me cringe every time I see it) and started chatting. Found pictures of her, me, Jen and everything!

I also heard that Crying Boy has a little something going on with that idiot plastic blonde Britney Spears. I told Tara and she said it’s a lie but I don’t know. Those fans may like ‘N Sync and that makes me question their sanity but they do seem to know what’s going on. They even knew about Tara singing karaoke one night in a private restaurant, so they must know something. Rumor has it that Justin’s dating her on the sneak tip. Why on the sneak tip, I don’t know. If he likes her what’s he doing with my girl What I do wanna know is when he has the time, because he’s up my Tara’s ass crack 24 fucking hours a day. But I’ll find out if it’s true or not. All I gotta do is hang around that freak Chris and he’ll let it slip, he has the biggest mouth I’ve ever seen.

I could ask JC. He’d tell me anything. When I went to their concert here in Maryland, his eyes were glued to my chest the whole show. But I’m used to that. Maybe I encouraged it a little, you know, since his dumb girlfriend was right next to me. She looked like she wanted to stick her cheap pointy-toed boots up my ass but knew better than to try to act cute. If he was all into me, what’s he doing with her? If I wasn’t the nice person I am, I’d step to him a little just to fuck with her. Shit, maybe I’ll do it anyway. I don’t like her ass anyway.

I guess I gave away my secret identity in this post, but so what. All the news is in some shit called egroups where people post like a million times a day about the group, I can just read those and not have to talk. Trying to talk nice was killing me anyway, now I can just lurk, as they all say. You can really get into this shit, let me tell you. But you already know that since you found this. It’ll be interesting to see how many people read this page and email me about it to see if it’s true. It is. I don’t have a reason to lie. But how much you wanna bet that no one’ll believe me because we’re black girls?

IT HAPPENS. THEY LIKE BLACK GIRLS. Some of them. The ones that count. Not that any of them count, I mean for Tara’s purposes. JC’s cute but I’m not rolling that way, he’s from Bowie and everybody knows only bamas roll outta there. Now Joey’s cool people. We get along just fine. I don’t know Lance, I think he might be bisexual. But he’s fucking around with Topanga who is a cool girlfriend, by the way. I met her at the game and hung out some. So maybe he’s not. I was all asking her about the dude who plays Shawn on the show, now that’s a hot white boy. If I was gonna cross the color line, he’d be the one. Him and Ricky.

Speaking of Ricky, I need to stop sweating details about that boy band and go search for shit on him and Jason. And maybe Backstreet. I saw some ‘N Sync hate
sites that were funny as shit, I bet they have some on that blazer wearing loser. He’s pure comedy.

Back later.